Things I've found on the internet today

I grew up watching a helluva lot of HBO (because my father stole our cable from the neighbors, naturally) and this song was one of my favorites. I've never seen the show (or read the book) it's apparently taken from, though. I think HBO just cut all the songs up and aired them in between programs.

It's relevant because I took the boys to the library today for "Summer Reading Program" activities and they were forced, strangely enough, to watch this in exchange for a soft pretzel. Brown-Eyes happily munched on his over the course of an hour while Blue-Eyes absolutely refused to take one with crossed arms, high-pitched loud voice, and everything. And no, I still have no idea why he got so angry and melodramatic over being offered a free pretzel.

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Romance author Jennifer Crusie pointed me to a blog where half of the pictures tend to remind me of something my friend Elliott either once did or will likely one day do.

The one that most comes to mind involves the time I went down to his dorm room in college and watched him happily stick half his body out of the window and proudly reemerge with a cold Dr. Pepper he'd chilled in the snow sitting on top of the central air-conditioning unit outside.

My favorite picture, though, is this ingenious spoon:

Duct Tape + Zip Tie = Spoon, indeed.

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"The Inventory" is easily my favorite regular feature at The A.V. Club and there was a particularly awesome one today concerning R. Kelly and gratuitous and often bizarre sexual acts mentioned on his recent album.

Also, I will totally buy their book when it comes out and place it on my coffee table... once I move out of my parents' house and again have a coffee table to put books on.

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And "So You Think You Can Dance" finally got good again. I think I forget every year that the dancing usually doesn't get crazy amazing until it gets closer to the Top 10 and they weed out most of the dancers who aren't versatile enough to pull off routines not in their particular specialty.



Man, I frickin love Wade Robson. He is totally my favorite choreographer on the show even if his stuff is sometimes absurdly strange. And I will say that I think Brandon's a great dancer but he has a bad habit (or unfortunate birth defect) of being unable to not look like Carlton from "The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air." He also looks particularly stupid when he pouts and he does that all of the damn time.

Upcoming Movies

(Click on the posters for trailers)

Will definitely go see:


Because I have enjoyed all of Apatow's movies so far. And the trailers made me laugh.

(Ponyo)

Because Miyazaki's kid-oriented movies are my favorite of his. And it's about a mermaid!!

And I won't be taking the boys because they can be frickin annoying at the movie theater and I don't want to be distracted. They can watch it on video.


Will Probably Go See:

Even though I only got about 2/3 of the way through the book because I just didn't like Julie and didn't care to read about her anymore. This is usually my problem with non-fiction memoirs. I like Amy Adams, though. And Meryl Streep.


Note: This post was brought to you with hardly any complete sentences. Just the way I like it.

Realty Show Whore

I'm trying to post regularly in here but I have a really bad habit of writing but not quite finishing up so I've got an amazing backlog of about a hundred (sadly, not an exaggeration) unfinished drafted posts that I'm going to try and polish up and spit out. (There's probably a less gross way to phrase that but I chose not to explore that route.)

Anyway, this first one's fairly relevant since I wrote it only a few weeks ago and I spent a good deal of this past Sunday watching a marathon of the fourth season of Hell's Kitchen with friends.

So, I was sitting at the kitchen table voting on TWOP's Tubey Awards (or at least on the preliminary nominees? I don't know. It involved judging and clicking so I was all for it) and I was having fun. I watched a decent amount of tv this past year (way more than a normal human being, way less than I used too, but significantly more than the previous year) so I had a variety of choices to pick from but there weren't many tough calls.

Then, the "Best Reality TV Show Host or Judge" pops up and the shit hit the fan.

"Ooh, Adam Shankman... I love him... Oh crap! Cat Deeley! How do I pick? ... Well, who else is... Gordon Ramsey, Jesus Christ... John Barrowman's in this damn category? Well, I don't think I could watch that show so I can pass on that one... RuPaul versus Tim Gunn?!"

I ended up picking RuPaul cause she's awesome and was a great host.

Gordon Ramsey would have won for Kitchen Nightmares but he doesn't do a whole lot but scream constantly and call people stupid cows and donkeys on "Hell's Kitchen" (which is way more entertaining than it has any right to be) and Shankman and Deeley canceled each other out ... though I would have picked Lil C in an instant if he'd been a contender.

Oh, and then Nigel Lythgoe won my vote for "Worst Reality TV Show Host or Judge" without a moment's hesitation. Because he's a pervy old man who is constantly pushing his "strict gender roles in dancing" agenda on an otherwise pretty awesome show.


(For those who don't know: The last four people mentioned are all from "So You Think You Can Dance." Deeley is the incredibly adorable host. Lythgoe's the executive producer and a main judge. Shankman is a regular guest judge. And Lil C is a regular choreographer and guest judge... and his wikipedia page jut told me he was in Stomp The Yard and now I really want to pull out my dvd.)